What’s the kindest way to say “I’m sorry I threw up at your housewarming party?"

“Sometimes I think illness sits inside every woman, waiting for the right moment to bloom.”
Gillian Flynn, Sharp Objects

Not that I need to know or anything. I’m totally asking for a friend. 

Well, alright – maybe it is for me. I wish I had a really exciting story that involved lots of shots and lampshades, but I am 40 and those days are long behind me.

It’s party time…and I’m feeling right…at least for about 45 minutes.

Instead it’s a story of not paying attention to my body, seriously over-eating and a drink or two that just weren’t what the doctor ordered.

All I know is one moment – there I was – just hanging out and having fun with all my friends.  ’Cause of course all my friends were there.  When you throw up at a house warming party it HAS to be the one with all your besties.  The next thing I know I was laid out and desperately sick.   Thankfully I had ridden over with a friend so I didn’t have to figure out how to get my pukey-butt into my car and drive home – but still – it’s a small consolation.

On the plus side – can I tell you about my amazing and wonderful friends?  They helped me – kept me company and eventually drove me home to my ever patient husband (who also assumed the illness was the results of shots and lampshades) and was quite surprised to learn it was just an unfortunate mix of events and a brewing belly bug.   Overall, everyone still agreed the housewarming was a huge success  and that the night was not ruined which made me feel much better.

The next morning I did have to address the question of just HOW to say sorry for such an unfortunate turn of events. After much deliberation and discussion with my hubs, I came to my decision.

Edible Arrangements.

So – if you are ever in the position of needing to apologize for a party mishap (or any other social event gone awry)…the Edible Arrangement is the kindest way to go.  Not only is it healthy, it’s also delicious and something about fruit cut into shapes and dipped in chocolate makes people instantly forget any past trangressions.  Maybe it’s the bright yellow of the pineapple flowers or the knowledge that I sold my first born child to pay for it  but whatever – it is the cure all for embarrassing social mishaps that don’t require a carpet cleaning.  If it requires carpet cleaning – then you have to provide BOTH the Edible Arrangement & the carpet cleaner.  Hey – I don’t make the rules here…

Overall, while not exactly how I intended my Friday night fun to end, I was really overwhelmed by the caring response of my friends to what is honestly a yucky situation.  As a Mom, I know how much it sucks to take care of a sick, puking person – especially when you are “off the clock” and enjoying some much needed Mommy freedom.  So – again – to all my wonderful, amazing, truly kind and caring friends – thanks for helping me through.  I think the best part about leading a kind life is that it seems to come back full circle.

Speaking of which – since I’m feeling so much better – any chance you’ll share that Edible Arrangement?  Ahh…kindness only goes so far!

Positively,

Kim